help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
