She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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