My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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