what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
