My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
