he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize
