like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
