ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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