He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Randomize
