he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
