I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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