I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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