Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
