Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
PANTIES FOUND
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize