Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
