I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I need to sanitize my soul.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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