One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
