May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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