remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
