It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
