Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
