what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
