Moan for me like Helen Keller
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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