redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
