it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize