so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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