I just pynch a tree in the face
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I want you more than these girls want KFC
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
