Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
