you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
