We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize