We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Randomize
