Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize