Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
