ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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