your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
