Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
