that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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