Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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