I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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