it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
