I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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