The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
