Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
