I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
