Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You took a bar mat shot.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
