can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
