i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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