I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
