you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize