I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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